Fashion Goss logo

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Have I ever told you that I've always had this itch for designing logos? Well I do. And because no one will ak me to make one for them, I made one for myself. So Fashion Goss, my very own fashion blog got its very own logo! This was made with elementary tools like MS Word and MS Paint. Pretty, ain't it?

Yin and Yang

I finally gave vent to my urge for collage art. I think my maiden work has turned out pretty good. What say you?

The Artist of Disappearance by Anita Desai: Impressions

I’ve never read an Anita Desai work before. Strangely enough, I don’t recollect having read even one article about her. Either I’ve missed out on it, or the media has never painted any glorious pictures of her. She is not scandalous, Kamala Das-like; she is not glamorous like a Shobha De; nor is she controversial, in the manner of Arundhati Roy. (Or is she?) The Wikipedia page on her is woefully lacking. Apart from the fact that she is a Sahitya Akademi winner, I know nothing. When I started this book, I knew not what to expect. But having finished ‘The Artist of Disappearance’, I want to know who Anita Desai, the person, is. What person writes like this? From whose pen flow words with the terrible beauty of death wishes? But she won’t give in easily. I must perhaps re-read the book, look carefully again between the lines, to understand the source of such enigma.

Yes; ‘enigmatic’ is the word that best describes ‘The Artist of Disappearance’. It is a collection of three novellas – ‘The Museum of Final Journeys’, ‘Translator Translated’ and ‘The Artist of Disappearance’ – stories of strange internal worlds, stories of crumbling, lost people and places. It is as if Anita Desai found the beautiful in the broken, and captured their fall as one would with slow motion photography. You will find it its pages an old IAS officer reminiscing about a an old curator of a forgotten museum, a middle-aged, middle-class teacher on an odyssey of translating a quaint book, and a hermit-artist living in the charred remains of his house, creating strange patterns in nature.

Unhurried – that’s Anita Desai’s writing. Beautiful, slow and sure amidst hoards of books that move so fast, there’s no time to think. I picture this writer, who has emerged from a 7-year literary hiatus with what is probably her last book (God forbid!) with stories about dwindling. She is weaving the emptiness of her own aged world into these pages. Sometimes her lines are labored, with the kind of effort an arthritic person makes when climbing the stairs. But there are so many breathtaking moments too. Especially in those magnified descriptions of nature. There are the kinds of observations people with the luxury of time or the love of nature make. I imagine the 70-something author as having them both. And what exquisite results they yield for the reader.

I don’t know how it is with her other books, but with this one Anita Desai takes time to grow on you. She doesn’t snare, she doesn’t tease, she doesn’t titillate. She grows surreptitiously on you like moss on rocks. Now she isn’t there, now she is. In the first few pages, you don’t know where the story is going or what the point of the story is. In fact, if you are looking for a traditional end, you may not find it even at the end of the story. Because her stories have no end. They are leisurely strolls through forgotten roads of old towns. Embark on ‘The Artist of Disappearance’ only if you can slow down and breathe deep.

  

Wellness for Every Season

The towering Four Seasons Hotel in Mumbai holds within itself an oasis of tranquility. Step into The Spa and watch your worries melt away

The menu of The Spa at the Four Seasons Hotel in Mumbai opens with a very interesting phrase: Invest in yourself. These are precious words of wisdom for any city-dweller lost in the chaos of existence. Up on the treadmill of routine, we seldom have any rest, little time and no peace. We forget how we abuse our bodies and minds in the daily grind; we forget about our brakes. Holding the menu in your hands and reading those words remind you of what you owe yourself. Those words remind you to stop, breathe, relax and most importantly, thank your body. They remind you that a much-needed spa session is what you should get and start afresh.

Feeling welcome

The Spa is spread over two floors of the Four Seasons Hotel and occupies a generous area. Upon entering the Spa Lobby Level 3, one is greeted by welcoming faces and an ambience that is contemporary, yet Indian. Little ethnic touches, like an elegant chest here, a flower pattern there, add warmth and a welcome air to the place. The Spa lounge plays soothing chants that puts visitors in the mood to unwind and relax. A retail area features several products used in the treatments, including perfumes, and ‘Gentlemen’s Tonic’ – the well known men’s grooming line on display. Clients may buy them, or simply acquaint themselves with products that will be used in their spa treatments. The Spa Manager then hands you a questionnaire with questions about your general health and medical conditions, as a part of the consultation. Based on the answers, you are recommended a treatment and explained its merits. The comfort level of the guest is ensured before any treatments are commenced.

The concept

The Spa likes to call itself an Indian spa, but it uses several Western treatments in tandem with Ayurvedic/Indian ones.  However, the ethos is Indian and it is reflected at several levels, like in their decor, their conduct and most importantly, the products they use. The spa extensively uses products from international brands like Lotus Wei, Sundãri, Ilā, and Forest Essentials, and Tathastu among others from India. These brands are not only Ayurvedic/Organic/Natural, but some are also known to support several NGOs. The Spa strives to support brands that support such causes. In fact, The Spa plans to eventually use all organic products for their treatments.

In keeping with their Indian approach, the spa offers complimentary Yoga programs for all spa members at the Yoga studio called Yoga Mudra. There are daily Sunrise Yoga sessions (at the rooftop) to start the day with, private and group Yoga sessions and even an Executive Yoga program, designed especially for the jet-setting professional. A meditation hall is adjacent to the Yoga studio, where clients can escape into tranquil recesses.

The interiors

As far as hotel spas go, The Spa at Four Seasons, Mumbai, is a sizeable one with almost 23,000 sq. ft., including the pool and the salon. It operates on the third and fourth levels of the hotel. Level three features the spa lounge and the men’s wet areas and relaxation lounge while the fourth level has eight treatment rooms and the women’s wet area and relaxation lounge. The interiors look warm with wooden furniture, earthy and pastel colours and plenty of natural light. In treatment rooms that require privacy, oil lamps or candles add to soft lighting.   

There are eight treatment rooms in all, all named after Yoga asanas. The Vajrasana and Nararajasana rooms are couples treatment rooms, with twin massage tables and a massive tub for two in each room. The Tadasana room or the Kerala room is where Ayurvedic treatments from Kerala like Shirodhara are given. The other five treatment rooms are single rooms. Strangely enough, the name plates of these rooms spell these names as Vajra-sana, Dhanura-sana, which looked rather odd because the proper suffix is ‘asana’, e.g. Vajra-asana… However, Sanskrit grammar apart, these treatment rooms are beautiful and very well conceptualized. It is here that therapists offer their clients treatments listed in the spa menu. Specific audio CDs with sacred chants and prayers complement the treatments, and massages strokes are often in tandem with the calming rhythm of the music. All the rooms have mood lighting, and the colour of the light changes in accordance with the treatment. Each room has its own private steam, shower chamber and locker room – something patrons really like and appreciate.  

Solus per aquas

Like all luxury spaces, there is a swimming pool alongside the spa. This rooftop pool is a private little sanctuary, with several cabanas and a small bar serving juices and drinks. There are even mini-treatments (20 minutes long) available at the poolside! From a separate spa menu called Cabana Comforts, clients can choose to have a quick head, hand or foot massage, which are named after the sun, moon and earth respectively.

However, one of our favourite spots at The Spa was the wet area, within the Changing Rooms. Besides the usual lockers and changing areas it features a wonderful expanse of the Vitality Lounge with its various ‘wet’ facilities. Guests are spoilt for choice here, with a choice of hot and cold Experience Showers, a Steam or an Ice Fountain to cool down with.   

However, the most wonderful feature of this wet area is the Vitality Pool. With its metal grill back rests and bubbling water, the pool looks absolutely inviting. Clients can soak in after a treatment, or simply step into it to wind down.

Speaking of winding down, The Spa has a dedicated Relaxation Room, where patrons can unplug, relax and even catch 40 winks post treatment!

The treatments

The Spa offers treatments divided into four main sections, namely Body Therapy, Ayurveda, The Ilā Experience and Face and Body.

 Massages of varying intensity – Ojas (intense), Tula (medium) and Mukta (soft) are offered under the Body Therapy. Other treatments include regulars like the Hot Stone Therapy and the non-so-regular ‘Apoha Mizra’. In fact, the latter is exclusive to The Spa at Four Seasons and is a unique combination of western techniques and Ayurvedic healing traditions.

The Ayurveda menu includes the highly popular Shirodhara, Pada Mardhana (intense foot massage), Uzhichil (body massage) and Shiro Mardhana (head massage).

The Ilā Experience therapies make exclusive use of Ilā products and include a Body Marine Algae Therapy, a Marine Facial, a Rainforest Rejuvenation Facial, a Ku Nye Massage (Tibetan), a Kundalini Back Massage and even a Pregnancy Scrub and Massage.  The Spa is one of the very few places that offer treatments for pregnant women. This gentle therapy employs a mild scrub, massage and music meant for the well-being of both, the mother and the baby.

The Face and Body package includes three Gotu kola variants – Firming Body Envelopment, a body polish and a firming facial. There are two other facial variants too called the Sundari Facial and the Neem Healing Facial. But the most popular treatment that belongs to this category is the Roopana Body Ritual. This treatment is often preferred by couples, and involves a neem-based treatment.

The Spa prides itself for its simple menu that offers clients clear choices. Assistant Spa Manager, Kamal Rana says, “We have kept our menu simple, so as to not confound our clients. The choices are straightforward, without being restrictive.”

The highlights

One of the distinguishing things about The Spa is that all their therapists are CIDESCO & CIBTAC certified. Even if freshers are hired, they are trained in house and are tested for their skills regularly. Of the eight therapists (7 women, 1 man), four are trained in Reiki and use their skills to complement the regular treatments.   

The Spa frequently introduces special programs and promotions, whereby special client categories are catered for. These include, for instance, discounts for senior citizens, ‘Spa and Dine’ packages for couples and even an innovative one named ‘Eat, pray, spa’.

Another notable thing about The Spa is the intelligent business strategy they have employed in terms of membership and accessibility. The spa is open to not only in house guests and spa members, but also walk-in patrons. In fact, 68% of their footfalls comprise such walk-in patrons. They also have a decent number of members at present. Lastly, the spa has a dedicated gym and a Rosano Ferretti salon. 


With big endevours and small, The Spa strives to make a client’s experience memorable and makes you want to ‘Invest in yourself’ time and again. 

Factfile

Opened in: 2008

Area: Over 23,680 sq. ft. (over levels 3 and 4)

Location: Worli, Mumbai

Spa manager: Anjna Poonia

Spa timings: 6am to 10.30pm on all days

Appointments: Pre-fixed, beginning at 9am every day

Gym timings: 6am to 10pm (flexible on request)

Pool timings: 7am to 7pm

Number of therapists: 8 (1 male, 7 female)

Products used: Sundãri, Ilā, Forest Essentials, Tathastu

Certification: CIDESCO & CIBTAC certified therapists

Specialities: Pregnancy massage, couple treatments

Most popular treatment: Roopana Ritual

Client profile: Mostly middle aged males

Website: http://www.fourseasons.com/spa/

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(This article appeared in the Jan-Feb 2012 issue of Spa Mantra - a B2B magazine for the spa and wellness industry. The article can also be read here.)

The luxury ticket to Phuket

This  stunning island may be small, but it is big on the choices is offers spa connoisseurs

Think Phuket, and you can’t help but think of beautiful beaches, tropical sunsets, luxurious spas, and a ton of fun! It is not for nothing that Phuket commands these wonderful images to one’s mind. Over the years, this sunny little island from Thailand has built up the best hotels, spas and other luxury destinations. A favourite among not just Asians but travellers from across the globe, Phuket offers so much that one is spoilt for choice. We take a look at the 10 best spas from among the hundreds that dot the city.

1. Banyan Tree Spa

Banyan Tree Hotels & Resorts is one of the most luxurious chains and respected names in the hospitality industry. Each of their facilities is truly world-class, no less their spas. The Bamboo Tree Spa in Phuket that opened in 1994, was the first luxury oriental spa in Asia and pioneered the concept of a tropical garden spa. It was among the first to offer beauty and health packages with holistic approaches – a tradition that has since been adopted by spas across the world. Presently, they offer packages that go by evocative names like Tranquility Hydromist (for men), Tropical Rainmist, Harmony Banyan and Royal Banyan among others. 

For the highest standards it adheres to, the Banyan Tree at Phuket has been a winner of several accolades. Among these are being ranked number two in the Top 10 Asia Resorts category at the Condé Nast Traveler 20th Annual Readers' Choice Awards. The resort was also ranked number eight in the Top 100 Resorts of the world.

Where

Banyan Tree Spa Phuket

33 Moo 4, Srisoonthorn Road,

Cherngtalay, AmphurTalang

Phuket, 83110

Thailand

Ph: +66 76 324 374

Email: spa-phuket@banyantree.com

2. Golden Tulip Ayurvedic Spa

The spa at the Golden Tulip Mangosteen Resort and Spa is the only one in Phuket to operate entirely on Ayurvedic principles. It has a certified Ayurvedic doctor, who offers a detailed consultation and analysis to patrons before beginning the treatment. The ‘Dosha’ of the patron is determined before prescribing the most appropriate treatment or therapy. It combines Yoga techniques with Ayurvedic treatments for complete rejuvenation.

The other great attraction of the Golden Tulip spa is its locale. It is situated on a secluded hillside and offers a panoramic view of four bays around it. In this unique setting are offered their signature treatments like Chakra Balancing, Dosha Purifying, Atma Healing, and Mangosteen Ayur Journey.  Other long-term health treatments also available here include Kaya Shodhna (detoxification program) and Rasayanam (rejuvenation) which take up to four weeks. 

These Ayurvedic treatments, combined with the stunning locale truly make the Golden Tulip Spa one of the best spas in Phuket.

Where

The Golden Tulip Mangosteen Resort

99/4 Moo 7, Soi Mangosteen, Rawai
Phuket, 83130
Thailand

Tel: +66 76 289 399

Email: spa@goldentulipmangosteen.com

3. Anantara Spa

Reviewers have often noted the attention to detail that has gone into the making of the Anantara Phuket Villas that is steps away from the Andaman Sea. Designed by the renowned Bill Bensley, a balance between the beauty of the surroundings and the beauty of the architecture is maintained throughout the property, especially the spa. The spa has five luxurious treatment suites, two suites with private terrazzo soaking tubs, a dedicated Ayurvedic suite, a couples’ treatment room and a traditional Thai sala for yoga and massages. In its serene environ, clients can choose to have any of the traditional Thai or Ayurvedic treatments.

The spa offers the signature Pearl of Andaman Treatment, which refreshes the body and mind with a floral foot ritual, followed by a traditional Chinese Herbal Back massage, shower, a Pearl Facial and finally a refreshment ritual. Other treatments include a Thai Herbal Compress Massage, the Journey of Siam, and the Lullaby Sleep Therapy among others.

Where

888 Moo 3 ,Tumbon Mai Khao,

Amphur Thalang, Phuket 83110

Thailand

Tel: +66 (0) 7633 6100

Email: phuket@anantara.com    

4. The Spa, Paresa Resorts

Look up Paresa Resorts on the Internet, and you will see only wonderful reviews about this beautiful resort on the Kamala Beach in Phuket. Little wonder that it was the winner of the Traveler’s Choice Award in 2011. The resort, with its idyllic location, provides the perfect setting for the exotic treatments it offers at the Paresa Resort Spa also known as the Kamala Phuket Spa. Treatments are inspired by ancient Thai healing rituals, and the spa, features 5 double treatments suites with baths and steam showers, and private balconies overlooking the Andaman Sea, where patrons can lounge and relax.

The spa specializes in detox and offers a variety of programs, starting from three days to 28 days. Several therapies are employed during the detoxification process, including the Ambrosia Therapy, Elixir Therapy, Meditation Therapy, Movement Therapy, Music Therapy, Scent Therapy and Treatment Therapy. These treatments coupled with their famed hospitality promises to make a visit to the Paresa Resort a great experience.

Where

49 Moo 6, Layi-Nakalay Road

Kamala , Phuket 83150

Thailand

Tel: +66 76 302000

Email: rsvn@paresaresorts.com or info@paresaresorts.com

5. Trisara

For those who like their beaches and their quiet, the Trisara Resort in Phuket is the perfect place to escape to. Located on the comparatively undeveloped north-western coastline of the island, the sea-facing resort with big walled-in gardens is tailor-made for people seeking privacy.  The spa within the resort is spread over 16,000 sq. feet with six private treatment suites, a treatment room for two persons, and the usual steam, shower and changing rooms.

The highlight of the spa is the Royal Trisara – a massage involving three masseurs simultaneously. The products used for their treatments are 100% organic and they work in partnership with expert herbalists who offer Purification and Revitalisation programs. Additionally, guests can avail of the yoga and meditation facilities.

Where

60/1 Moo 6,

Srisoonthorn Road,

Cherngtalay, Thalang,

Phuket 83110 Thailand

Tel: +66 76 310100

Email: reservations@trisara.com 

6. Palm Spa, Twinpalms

Twinpalms is one of the most popular traveler hangouts in Phuket with its restaurants, nightclub, beachclub and especially The Palm Spa. The world-class spa, like the rest of the resort, is known for its chic, modern and minimalist interiors and an array of treatments. From detoxifying body wraps to a Swedish Massage to a traditional Thai Massage, the treatments are all top of the line and are done using the best in spa products.

The Palm Spa specialises in some super-long treatments, called the ‘Dream Packages’ that can take up to four hours. Take for instance the ‘Dawn till Dusk’ package that includes a steam, Jacuzzi, polish, wrap, massage and facial and takes four hours. If that sounds too long for you, similar packages with lesser durations are available too, like the ‘Daydreamer’s Duluxe (3 hours)’, ‘Siam Traditions (3 hours)’, ‘Surin Essentials (2 hours)’ and ‘Bid Stress Farewell (2 hours)’ among others.

Where

106/46 Moo 3,

Surin Beach Road,

Cherng Talay,

Phuket 83110, Thailand

 Tel: +66 (0) 7631 6500

Email: book@twinpalms-phuket.com

7. Tew Son Spa, Katathani Beach Resort

The spa at the Katathani Phuket Beach Resort gets its unique name from the swaying Casuarina or Tew Son (in Thai) trees that line the property. The spa even has a special Casuarina Leaf Enzyme Wrap as one of its treatments on the Spa Menu!

Located in the secluded Kata Noi Bay, the Katathani resort has won awards by Thailand Tourism many times over. Far from the madding crowd, the Tew Son spa makes for a wonderful place to unwind and relax. The spa uses the best products to administer age-old Thai massages and treatments. Notable among them are the ‘Secrets of Siam’ couple’s treatment and the 4-hour-long Katathani Paradise package. Other routines include an Aromatic Herbal Steam, facials, a roof-top Jacuzzi, foot and body massages and manicures and pedicures.

Where

14 Kata Noi Road,

Karon, Muang,

Phuket 83100 Thailand

Tel: +66 (0) 7633 0124 to 6

+66 (0) 7628 4096 to 100

Email: reservation@katathani.com

8. Spa Royale, Mom Tri’s Villa Royale

If a royal treatment is what you want from your spa in Phuket, the place to go to is Mom Tri’s Spa Royale at the famous Mom Tri’s Villa Royale Boutique Hotel. Created by renowned artist and architect, Mom Tri (also a descendant of the Thai royal family), the multiple award-winning hotel and its spa offer traditional and luxurious treatments to its clients.

Among the treatments offer at the Spa Royale are steam baths, facials, body and foot massages, body scrubs and wraps, and aromatherapy massages. Notable among them are the Tamarind with White Mud and Yoghurt body treatment and the Royale Treatment's Siam Bouquet body mask and gentle scrub that uses a centuries-old recipe with a blend of nine flowers used by ladies of the court in the royal palace.

Where

12 Kata Noi Road,

Kata Noi Beach,

Phuket, 83100 Thailand

Tel: +66 76 333 568

E-mail: info@villaroyalephuket.com

9. Aman Spa, Amanpuri

The Aman properties are all known names in the wellness industry, but the Aman Spa at Amanpuri, Phuket holds a special place. It was the first full service spa among them and has been a firm favourite among regulars.

The Aman Spa features six huge Thai-style pavilions that have been tastefully done up with wood and glass interiors. Expert therapists offer personalized assessments to clients and recommend tailor-made treatments. Treatments are given only with the best quality handpicked oils and creams made from organically-grown plants. The most noteworthy treatments include the essential body cleansing scrub with Himalayan crystal salts, the Envelope Me wrap that uses red or white Argiletz clay, the Zone facial that involves reflexology and their Swedish-sports fusion massage program. Yoga and meditation are complimentary.

Where

Pansea Beach, Phuket 83000
Thailand

Tel: +66 76 324 333

Email: amanpuri@amanresorts.com

10. Phang Nga Resort and Spa, Aleenta Phuket

Here is a spa within a resort with a green heart. The Phang Nga Resort and Spa at Aleenta has won many accolades, notably Thailand’s Best Small Green Resort. The Natai Beach on which it is located, has been awarded 5 stars for cleanliness of beach and water quality, which speaks volumes about the standards the resort maintains.

Apart from cleanliness, what is unique about the resort is the spa here, called the IV Spa. It is so called because it offers four signature treatments inspired by the four elements viz. the sun, moon, earth and sea. Called the Sun Experience, Moon Experience Sea Experience and Earth Experience respectively, each is a combination of treatments like facials, wraps, scrubs and massages. It also offers something called the Traditional Experience with time-tested Thai techniques and even a special Couples Experience.

Where

33 Mu 5, Khokkloy

Thakuathung,

Phang Nga 77220,

Thailand

Ph: +66 2-514-8112

Email: grm.aph@aleenta.com

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(This article appeared in the Jan-Feb 2012 issue of Spa Mantra - a B2B magazine for the spa and wellness industry. The article can also be read here.)

Prince of Ayodhya - Book one of The Ramayana by Ashok Banker: Impressions

So, I’ve taken upon myself the reading of the seven-part Ramayana series by Ashok Banker, which has gathered considerable acclaim since the time the first book was published. I will be reading the series alternating each part with another novel to avoid fatigue. Not that Banker’s writing is tiresome; but there’s only so much one can endure of the same style. So the book reviews will also come in that alternating sequence, and in reviewing them, I will treat each book as an individual entity rather than as part of the series.

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Of the two great Indian epics, the Mahabharata is a clear favourite of many because of its complex layers and the imperfect hence ‘real’ characters. In the Ramayana everyone, save the villains, seems to be doing the right thing. At least on superficial reading, the characters of the Ramayana seem all black or all white, and the story the same old good versus bad. It is much easier to identify with the Mahabharata than with the idealistic Ramayana. It is so much easier to love a flawed Krishna than a perfect Rama. It was because of this irritating perfection that the Ramayana never got through to me. My little knowledge of the epic was based on the Ramanand Sagar production aired on Doordarshan so many years ago when I was a little girl, and through snatches of the popular stories that are part of the great Indian collective consciousness. For me, Ramayana could be summed up in 7 sentences. 1. Rama marries Sita. 2. Goes to a 14-year-old exile with wife and brother in tow because his stepmother wished and his father said so. 3. Ravana abducts Sita. 4. Rama and his wanar sena defeat Ravana. 5. Sita is banished, has two sons in forest, reunites with Rama after a while. 6. Rama asks Sita for a ‘faithfulness’ test; Sita passes test, but is so pissed with Rama, she kills herself. 7. And the sundry lived not so happily ever after. The end. But I knew there was a lot more to the Ramayana than the version in my head. And without knowing that I was waiting for a version of the Ramayana that was equally accessible and exciting, I was waiting for it. As for all things mytho-religious, I realised my hunger for it once I heard about Banker’s series last year. I let my hunger grow, and bought the whole series once the seventh and the last book was out. I am not disappointed. The Prince of Ayodhya is as pacy an epic as you will ever see. Written in a style that will conjure graphic novel images in your head, the story moves fast. Characters from the far-removed Treta Yuga come alive speaking Banker’s modern tongue, with a smattering of Hindi. The use of Hindi words seems to me as unnecessary and at best, eccentric. His easy English is good enough to transport a reader to the Aryan city of Ayodhya and beyond. But what is most admirable about the book is the depth with which the characters and the plot is explored. That Rama and Lakshman went on a demon-slaying mission with Maharishi Vishwamitra right at the beginning of the Ramayana is something I’ve never heard before. That Dasarath was a typical Aryan king with a healthy sexual appetite and had many concubines apart from his three wives is another fresh bit of information. Popular mythology laced with religion tends to tone down and gloss over many such details. Rama also, for example, has been portrayed in some places as a perfectly normal teen. There is also a healthy dose of magic and sorcery, which in some places reads like an LOTR or a Harry Potter. That said, if Banker’s claim of replicating the original Ramayana in the most part is to be believed, then this series is a good place to start for those looking to savour the epic in its entirety. I am certainly looking forward to starting book two of the series.

A Beautiful Truth by Diana Hayden - book review

A Groomed Goddess

Erstwhile Miss World and grooming expert, Diana Hayden, divulges in the essentials of grooming in her first book, A Beautiful Truth

Reviewer | Urmi Chanda-Vaz

We’ve read column after column on make-up tips, fitness, and skin or hair issues in magazines. We’ve seen lifestyle gurus offer advice on TV. But rarely, if ever, has there been a complete resource that a woman might turn to for quick, easy solutions to everyday questions about grooming. In what looks like a first, Miss World 1997, Diana Hayden has offered women a one-stop book offering complete grooming solutions.

The simple yet extensive book A Beautiful Truth: The Art of Grooming for Women has a self-explanatory title, and Hayden covers a host of issues that fall under the purview of female grooming. There are various categories including Body Shape & Clothing, Innerwear & Underwear, Accessories, Skincare, Make-up, Haircare, Bodycare, Posture & Poise, and Health & Fitness, in which she offers clear and precise mantras. Beauty and hair enthusiasts will find the sections on Skincare, Make-up and Haircare especially useful.

Hayden follows a simple format throughout all the sections, where there is general information about the subject, some DIY instructions, some Dos and Don’t’s, Tips and Tricks, and concluding them with three mantras she lives by. Notably, the author always offers safety advice, which is woefully lacking in most Indian writing.  

The thing that struck me the most about this book was how matter-of-factly it has been written; how wonderfully free of pretense it is. Hayden writes it like it is for a regular woman, and does not sound like a beauty queen in an ivory tower. She peppers the book with anecdotes and memories from her life that makes the advice seem real. Hayden tells you how to reach for the stars, but with her feet fixed firmly on the ground.

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This article appeared in the May 2012 issue of StyleSpeak - the salon and spa journal

Mindsight by Dr. Dan Siegel - book review

The book does not exaggerate when it says it offers ‘The new science of personal transformation’

Review by | Urmi Chanda-Vaz

Even before I got around to understanding the idea of mindsight, I was reminded of the vast and inexhaustible powers that our minds and brains have. Reading this book by Dr. Daniel J. Siegel was like revisiting all those postgraduate psychology classes from years ago. I thought I had forgotten them, but with page after page, recollections of all the major concepts came tumbling out. I could pick up on the trail where I had left it. We truly never forget anything entirely. Our entire pasts and tremendous capacities for our futures lie within our minds. Mindsight is about channeling the vastness of the treasure of the mind.

One of the first things about this book is that it can be understood, enjoyed and applied equally by a mental health professional, a wellness expert, and a layperson, who wants to live an enriched  life. Mindsight, as Dr. Siegel defines it, is ‘a process that enables us to monitor and modify the flow of energy and information within the Triangle of Wel-Being’. One can learn to observe one’s own thought processes, the motivation behind actions, the formation of reactions, and thus guide one’s behaviour in fruitful ways. In simpler terms, mindsight is cultivating heightened mindfulness.

The book is written in two sections. The first section explains the basics of the brain - its anatomy, structure and functions, and is meant for those who either have no background in psychology or who, like me, would like to brush up on their fundamentals. It is in this section that the author introduces the readers to the common hand model of the brain, which he uses repeatedly in his therapy chapters later on in the book.

The second section is about Mindsight. Professionals may jump straight to this section, and begin to delve into this innovative therapeutic process formulated by Dr. Siegel. In every chapter in this section, the author begins with a case study from his own practice, which focuses on one issue. Non-clinical and common issues like those of relationships, self image, self confidence, phobias, and psychosomatic pains are highlighted in these case studies. Dr. Siegel then demonstrates, how with the help of mindsight, he helps his patients integrate their pasts and presents,  find and rectify problem patterns in their relationships, and open up channels of communication.

Dr. Siegel explains that the points of the relationships-mind-brain Triangle (of Well-being) are interconnected, and how one cannot do without the other. Through a simplistic model of the brain, he explains how our brains are wired, how mindsight can help form new neural circuits, and consequently ‘grow’ our brains and our ability to form nurturing relationships with ourselves and those surrounding us.

Apart from the application of mindsight in a professional setting, it is a great tool for everyday living. Mindsight empowers us with empathy, positivity, and clear reasoning, and can be applied to fix many problems in life. It is, as the book proclaims, a powerful new tool for personal transformation. Moreover, the book is easy to grasp with concepts so lucid, that anyone will be able to understand and apply its simple yet powerful principles. Mindsight helps cultivate wellness in our minds, which then extends to our bodies, and finally our entire lives. It is a good book to read and keep at home, in spas and wellness centres, offices, or any place where people matter. 

About the author

Dr. Daniel J. Siegel is a psychiatrist with nearly two decades of experience and is currently the clinical professor of psychiatry at the UCLA School of Medicine. Apart from that he is the executive director of the Mindsight Institute and the author of several groundbreaking books on the same subject.

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The article appeared in the May-June 2012 issue of Spa Mantra and can be read on the website as well.

Leftovers

(Image: feministing.com)

He undresses me. He turns off the lights. In bed, he takes me in his arms and I close my eyes. But I have not been able to close my eyes, and shut it all out. You travel the years, the darkness, and are there. Always there. I see you so clearly, it’s frightening. I don’t think I saw you then like I do you now. At the end of every day, when I lie in bed - alone sometimes, sometimes not - you are there. Hijacking my present, hijacking my all. You left long ago, but you never left, did you?

Because the other morning, when I turned away from the mirror, I saw a flash of red in my reflection. How did that happen, when I removed every shade of that colour from my life after you left? Because a few moons ago, I remember hearing footsteps climbing outside, in the corridor, your characteristic drag, that little tap against the wall with your fingers. Rat-a-tat-tat. Because just yesterday, I opened my cupboard and caught a strong whiff of your cologne. You never left, did you?

I catch myself snapping at my lover because he is not you. Then I bite my lip, and fake affection. He has no clue. He does not know of the strings attached. Strings so long, they have years for yards. Hooked to the nape of my neck, the small of my back, heck, my heart even, these strings traverse distances unknown and place their ends into your hands. You perhaps do not know. But you play me still, like you did in those days and nights of dirty love. I laugh thinking how you left, but never really did. My lover stops. He senses something odd - like a sheet of glass between our bodies. But he cannot see it. He never will.

So why leave at all if you had to continue haunting me? If you had to flash through my mind seconds before he loses himself in me? If you linger on, like yesterday’s perfume, in the crinkle of my eye, the lines on my palm? Why do you linger, half here, half wherever it is that you have gone to, your life at a standstill and my life...? Hanging on by threads that look like they are about to snap but they will not, they will not. They have frozen over, delicate, fragile beyond any bond ever formed, but frayed over time in the glare of your going.

He kisses my mouth, seeking my tongue, but the taste of your being interferes. I respond, but haltingly, reminding myself this is him, this is not you. He runs his fingers through my hair, down my back and my legs, but my pleasure is marred by the memory of your fingers. I respond, but haltingly, reminding myself this is him, this is not you. Not you. My love notes are not entirely his either. Words meant for you keep slipping in, and I crumple sheet after sheet. How you still punctuate the story of my life.

He can sense so much amiss. I feel terrible for him on days when I am alone. I feel terrible when I see his naivete, when I hear him tell his friends I am not easy to ‘get’. When I slip in and slip out, to him it is mystery. Mysterious. It fascinates him. He tells his friends I am not ‘that into him’. He is drawn to this, this lack of the real me, this lack of a total presence of me. Like a moth to fire, he does not see it is going to suck the life marrow out of him one day. But he can sense so much amiss. I see it flit across his face when I smother your name on my tongue before it escapes my lips. I see it reflect on his brow when I jerk his fingers away when he tries to find mine, almost as if a stranger touched me.

He turns away, sulking, his pride hurt. But his manhood won’t comply. I see his body has gotten used to mine, his heart to my love (or pity or sympathy). I take his hand to apologise without words, and can’t help but see how his fingers are nothing like yours. I’ve never quite gotten used to his stubby, awkward fingers. Fingers that don’t know what they are doing, where they are headed. I remember your hands, those beautiful, confident hands, even as I hold his, and juggle three lives. He is fast appeased, his eagerness most apparent. He begins to make love to me again, hungrily. I recognise this hunger. This isn’t much unlike what I felt for you. Not at all unlike what I still feel for you.

And so I wonder, sometimes, if that is why you left me. Was I too eager? Too hungry for you? Did I yearn too much? Did I hold on too much? Did I show you how vulnerable I was with you, how much I needed you, not just to love me, not just to make love to me, not just to tell me that you found me breathtakingly beautiful, but to be that tower of light to a ship lost on sea? Did I cling too much? Did I smother you and scare you away? And this, now, this odd, frighteningly clear presence of you that I have around me night and day, is it just me? Is it the idea of you that I am projecting on to every present moment I have? Am I killing my now because I want to hold on so badly to our yesterday?

Questions there are no answers to. It is like having to lay in bed with a million demons. Where are you now, I know not. Why you left without a word, I know not. What we could have been, I know not. Yet I must live in the shadow of your presence, wear it like my skin, breathe your memories like my life depended on it. I must love another (for who can live without love?), knowing it will never be the same, no man will be you, no passion so perfect. I let him nibble my ear, gush love-laden streams into them, and I find myself laughing. I am not pretending either. Pleased, he leaves. But I hear your laughter too, calling me a sentimental idiot like you did. I resign myself to him, and to you. Strange, aching threesomes. Perhaps I will learn to live this way...

But perhaps, I will not survive this breach. This rip in loyalty, this splitting of my spirit into two. Perhaps, I will not survive this choice, while I stand here now, on this ledge, looking down into this dark, grey abyss. Perhaps, in the mangled remains of my physical form, he will see that crack too and he will understand why I never seemed to possess my own body. Minutes away from now, I will not have to make this choice anymore. Minutes away from now, I will have forgotten my name, your name, his name. I will have forgotten these lines as I teeter on this edge, between life and death. This rush of wind and the quiet it brings is liberating. The numbness on my skin will be a relief from the memory of your fingers on my flesh. Finally. Finally, my eyes shall be able to shut it all out.

(Co-written with Reema Prasanna @ScrollsNInk)

Living

(Image source: Seismic_2000's Flickriver stream)

Someone has died.

Someone I know not from too long ago, died. He was a colleague from my ex-ex-workplace, and he died last evening. Young, boisterous, beer-guzzling, kebab-loving AK died of some terrible kind of stomach infection. I find out on Facebook this morning. I am shocked, sad, upset. I leave a customary RIP message on that post made by my ex-ex-boss. But because I am on Facebook, and I have 10 minutes before getting ready for office, I proceed to 'Like' some posts and pictures of other friends. Someone's even had a baby. "Congrats!" I say.

But someone has died.

A mother's son. I am given to tears. No parent should have to live through the death of their offspring. I am trying to remember if he had a girlfriend. I am wondering about crushed dreams. I am also looking at the clock and cursing myself. I could be late. I hate getting late. I run into the shower, and I am thinking to myself how uncertain life is, and how hot the water is. I turn off the geyser. The cold water feels nice on my sweat-dried, worked-out skin. I am reminded of the ritual of bathing dead bodies before clothing them in finery for their last journey. I am also taking mental notes about buying soap on my way back home from work. I like Mysore Sandal Soap.

But someone has died.

AK won't need soap again, or the money to buy soap. He won't need to worry about getting to work on time, or working at all. He won't need to stand in front of the cupboard and decide what to wear. But he must have done it all a week ago, perhaps a month (I don't know how long he was ill). How inconsequential all of it seems now. But the pink skirt is what I choose. It's not ironed, but it's okay; people will be looking at my freshly-waxed legs anyway. Irreverently, 'Yai re, yai re, zor lagake nache re' pops into my head. It is perhaps the skirt that invoked the image of Urmila swaying to music. I brush it off, chastising myself. I wonder at the measure the human mind takes to cope with bad news/grief/disorder. Anything to maintain the semblance of the normal. I wear my Titan Raga watch. It has been nicely fixed now. The glass face was broken. I also wear some dangly earrings - with a heart and a star on it. Must scoot. I wonder about the wisdom of wearing heels today.

But someone has died.

Someone who, just like me, cared about how he looked. He and I won the "Best Dressed Employees" that year on Diwali. He made the effort to adorn his body. But he doesn't have a body anymore. Taken away just like that. With something as 'lame' as a stomach infection. Why, I get those all the time. This doesn't seem real... ("R.K. Studio", I tell the rickshaw wala. These darned shoes are still giving me shoe bites)... Until last week, a young person dying of a heart attack seemed unreal. A junior from college. And until three weeks before that a young person, a college mate, committing suicide seemed so. News-y things happening to people I once shared spaces with. My world has three less familiar faces. These faces didn't mean much while they were living, but now that they are gone, the gap is noticeable. Not for long, though. Perhaps this is what it feels like when a tooth is extracted. You stop noticing it after some days. These guys here, drinking chai and smoking cigarettes, sending admiring glances my way as I walk up the steps of the office building, won't miss me if I stopped coming to office; if I stopped existing. For now, they make my effort to match my lipstick with my outfit seem worth it. I am drifting. I am going about my life, my work, as I would everyday. I am on Twitter, on excel spreads and word documents, on fashion websites and messengers, and good old Facebook, where a picture of AK, along with a condolence post by other ex-ex-colleagues remind me that     

someone has died.   

I am thinking people become pictures so easily. Like a little hiccup in our routines. Tomorrow, the lame jokes will start. But that's the thing about being alive. About worrying about groceries, and EMIs, an old crush, a new love, illnesses, weight loss, familiar sex, good music, favourite movies, pride, regret, old friends, new friends, and so much more. It is also about getting bugged with interns' questions, as I am now, about getting irritated with the excessive sugar in the watery coffee that this peon makes, about feeling elated at having helped change people's course of life, about sleeplessness that comes when your young children are young, or old. I think I am beginning to shed the romantic notions of dying young. For the first time, I feel greedy about living. There are so many people to live for, and so much in life to celebrate, although

someone has died.